Why God Didn't Get Tenure - joke hanging in new lab... (Nov/02/2010 )
Why God Didn't Get Tenure
1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal.
5. Some even doubt he wrote it himself.
6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.
9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.
10. When one experiment went awry he tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the Book.
13. Some say he had his son teach the class.
14. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountaintop.
This is great...LOL
So awesome!
My friend said his Christian friends had a fit when they saw this, but that it was 100% worth it XP
Yeah...I know some religious people would object but seriously, even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the platypus.
rkay447 on Wed Nov 10 22:38:19 2010 said:
Yeah...I know some religious people would object but seriously, even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the platypus.
Thats is a really sad thing to say about the platypus. Did you know that the Platypus' electroreception is the most sensitive of any monotreme. They are like "Daredevil" in their own way...
gt_ameya on Thu Nov 11 05:25:04 2010 said:
rkay447 on Wed Nov 10 22:38:19 2010 said:
Yeah...I know some religious people would object but seriously, even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the platypus.
Thats is a really sad thing to say about the platypus. Did you know that the Platypus' electroreception is the most sensitive of any monotreme. They are like "Daredevil" in their own way...
Err, mind to tell me about the platypus story? I don't really get it...
A quote from a newsweek article:
"The 1999 comedy Dogma opens with a disclaimer, exhorting the audience to remember that “even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the Platypus. Thank you and enjoy the show. P.S. We sincerely apologize to all Platypus enthusiasts out there who are offended by that thoughtless comment about Platypi. We at View Askew respect the noble Platypus, and it is not our intention to slight these stupid creatures in any way. Thank you again and enjoy the show.”
God expressed his sense of humor, of course, in assembling a creature that is a little bit mammal (the platypus, a native of Australia, produces milk and is furry), a little bit reptile (it lays eggs and has venom, released from spurs in the hind legs) and a little bit bird (eggs again, plus it has a bill like a duck as well as webbed feet)."
Anyway, it's actually a very common joke that the platypus is proof that God has a sense of humor. Just google "platypus God's joke" and you come up with many hits...including the Urban dictionary. I'm just having a difficult time believing that I actually made someone angrier with a joke about a platypus than the joke making fun of God. Wow...must be a slow day in science.
rkay447 on Thu Nov 11 15:19:37 2010 said:
A quote from a newsweek article:
"The 1999 comedy Dogma opens with a disclaimer, exhorting the audience to remember that “even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the Platypus. Thank you and enjoy the show. P.S. We sincerely apologize to all Platypus enthusiasts out there who are offended by that thoughtless comment about Platypi. We at View Askew respect the noble Platypus, and it is not our intention to slight these stupid creatures in any way. Thank you again and enjoy the show.”
God expressed his sense of humor, of course, in assembling a creature that is a little bit mammal (the platypus, a native of Australia, produces milk and is furry), a little bit reptile (it lays eggs and has venom, released from spurs in the hind legs) and a little bit bird (eggs again, plus it has a bill like a duck as well as webbed feet)."
Anyway, it's actually a very common joke that the platypus is proof that God has a sense of humor. Just google "platypus God's joke" and you come up with many hits...including the Urban dictionary. I'm just having a difficult time believing that I actually made someone angrier with a joke about a platypus than the joke making fun of God. Wow...must be a slow day in science.
well, I am not angry (tho I'd have you burn at the stake in the 16th century).... but hopefully God and the poor platypus apppreciate the joke too...
...so how about a joke making fun of some "die-hard" scientists:Veritas Vos Liberabit
Maybe god thought the platypus was cute... *shrugs*