Left love for science? - (Dec/19/2006 )

How many of you had to leave their love partner for the sake of research? if not, how do you manage having a relationship and long working hours? Does your partner mind that?

Hmmm, am feeling lucky. May be my GF had great intutive powers so she ditched me long before I started doing research...
On a serious note, if your spouce/bf/gf is understanding enough and mature enough then they should co-operate with you and the person who is involved more in work should understand that there is someone who is desperately waiting for them to speak to and give maximum possible consideration and priority and time....(See ..for some topics you do not need exp to comment )

Well it depends on ur partner and how strong is ur relationship, my husband used to work till 1 am and comes to home only for 2 hours a day but i understand his work , sometimes partners who see each others 24 hours aday split because of mismatching so ita all about personality.

if your partner does see that spending time with him is more important than spending time doing research (my case ) so you must decide what is more important to you. I sacrificed research to love, but you dont have to feel down about it. I pack all my work in 6-7 hours per day and im doing fine. If i can do it, you can do it too, if you really think it's worth it.

I am married, but my wife accompany me in my lab no matter how late I work.

Relationship mean compromise, either you or her, or both.

if your partner does see that spending time with him is more important than spending time doing research (my case ) so you must decide what is more important to you. I sacrificed research to love, but you dont have to feel down about it. I pack all my work in 6-7 hours per day and im doing fine. If i can do it, you can do it too, if you really think it's worth it.

first my friend left France to do a post-doc here in Switzerland. I was going there one week-end out of 2 because I knew someone doing the same, and we were traveling together.
I was working hard all the week, working late, but leaving early on friday afternoon, and coming late on monday morning, one week out of 2.
Then I moved for an intermediate position, still in France, but increasing the distance with Switzerland.
I was working from 7 AM to 10 PM, traveling to switzerland one week-end per month, and he was doing the same to France, one week-end per month;
during these week-ends, we were really together. Nothing else mattered.

Now I joined him in Switzerland, we are together 7 days per week and not.
we are 3 : him, me and the lab, all the time.
it's different.
however we are now able to go further in our relation, and to make a family.

if you really love your friend, you can make sacrifices.
I don't know how it is when the distance is so huge that you see each other only during holidays (something like USA-Europe), however I know some persons who did it, and their relationship survived.
you need to trust each other also.
sometime you call at home, nobody, at lab, nobody. You have to trust.

QUOTE

I am married, but my wife accompany me in my lab no matter how late I work.

you mean she goes to your work place if you are to be late?